I recently came across this quote on my favorite website (www.etsy.ca) and I instantly was drawn to it.
I have tried my whole life to find my footing in the world, and, at several points, have lost it. Sometimes I run, and make giant leaps, others I stumble and step backwards. More often than not, I am walking like I'm intoxicated - swaying back and forth between choices, side to side with different thoughts and feelings. Lost and trying to find my way - or, sometimes, trying to create my own way.
My teenaged years were full of stereotypical angst. I jumped between groups of friends, I made my personality fit with individuals, so I wasn't "cast out" for being me. I ran around trying to find a me that everybody would like. As I grew, and matured, I realized that everybody is not going to like me - it's just not possible. I need to be true to me, and to be who I am.
I feel again like I am in high school, trying to fit in.
I have made mistakes, huge earth-shattering choices, and I stand here, seeing the aftershock and wondering how we all got here. While, on the inside, I am still the same scared teenager. I still want to fit in, I still want to laugh and smile and have my friends and family surround me. I am emotionally fragile, yet at the same time, empowered. I am scared and introverted, but at the same time confident and loud.
As an adult, I have struggled immensely, responsibilities weigh heavily on a person, and I am no exception. I have ran into, and out of, the arms of a marriage. I have stumbled through the dark forests, tripping over roots, and pulling them up. I have planted seeds, sown seeds, and, more often than not, I have watched them wither and die. The past cannot be changed, and as frustrating that may be, I must move on. Forge a new path. Plant new seeds. Hope that my feet keep me grounded, while my wings lead me to new horizons.
Feet - why do I need you? You have made me fall, you have led me to dark places. With my wings, I can fly.
Peace and Love,
J
